This past Sunday would have been the day I delivered Penelope last year. 34 weeks pregnant exactly. For almost the entirety of my pregnancy with our son, I haven't carried worry about delivering early, or anything for that matter. The couple days leading up to being 34 weeks pregnant this time however, I felt a bit more anxious. So rarely do things happen the same way twice, but it was still a real feeling of 'maybe my body only carries to a certain point?', and other limiting/fear-based thoughts. Once 11:30am passed on Sunday - the time Penelope was born - I felt a bit more at ease. Listening to my "Joyful Pregnancy Affirmations" were a really helpful tool too. Today, I feel back on track and normal. There is a newness that comes with being further than I have ever been. I have more focus on nesting and prepping things - but not a rush as I didn't have it done before 34 weeks either. I'm making lists all the time - what to put in my hospital bag, in our son's bag, how to prepare good food and snacks for once he is born, and any other items we need to get in order to make our home ready to welcome our son! Ah! And on top of that, Penelope is turning 1 in a few days...! Something I've been getting emotional about for the past 2 months. I'd go through all her old photos when she was in the NICU, seeing how much she's grown and end up spending 1-2 hours late at night on my laptop crying and reminiscing over our memories. This week I feel like I've been too busy to reflect a lot, and part of me doesn't want to believe she is already 1. I know it's a common feeling for moms, as a lot of friends around us have gone through it in the last little while. 365 days of incredible changes, in our baby, our family, and as parents. I feel lucky learning the lesson of how fast your babies grow up, so I can savour again, the time with a newborn, and knowing on days that are tiring and hard, what a blip they really are.
After the Bachelor ended, I still wanted to have regular hang-outs with my girl gang who came over to watch bach. The past two Tuesday's I've gone and seen movies - it's a great treat (thank you, Mark!) Baby 2 went bananas for Kong's deep grunts. Slightly less enthused with Beauty and the Beast, but who can blame him? Lots of kicking and sliding around when the movie speakers are booming. Sleeping is still great! I recently got on a chocolate milk kick - and I can't seem to slow down. Before writing this, I ate a full frozen pizza to myself, so baby and I are 'eatin good'. I bought a large pink exercise ball which has been nice to sit on for when we play board games as leaning over is a 'no-go'. And no, I don't remember the last time I shaved my legs. If I wear a non-maternity shirt, 1-4 cm of bare belly sticks out. I don't like that feeling so I something tuck my pants over my t-shirt in the front. It's a good look. Other than that - not too much to report. Doctor confirmed his head is down (Woo!), and he is looking like a happy healthy baby! We are happy!
Prep. Last year, we had no time to prep. We had read no books, finished 3/7 birthing classes, packed no hospital bag, and generally knew nothing. We went to the hospital on a Thursday wanting to check what I was leaking, and found out it was a little amniotic fluid. They told me there I was probably going to deliver my baby 'today'. I called my mom crying, and once she came, Mark left and packed the hospital bag. I tell everyone to this day what an amazing job he did. Some of the things he thought of that were instrumental (that I 100% blanked on) were: Himalayan Salt Lamps (and with spare lights that we actually needed... what a man), slippers *ESSENTIAL*, robe, laptop and speakers, Mars bar, and a quilt. Building on the great bag Mark packed last time, here is what is in mine now:
- my comfiest pants
- my comfiest sweater
- couple camisole tank tops (good for breastfeeding)
- flip flops (shower)
- nursing bras
- loads of granny panties (ur welcome)
- breast pads (I prefer the disposable ones - I felt they were a lot less messy)
- gatorade powder (blue, obviously)
- Luna bars and granola bars
- swell bottle
- calendula tincture and squish bottle (to mix with water for rinsing bottom after birth)
- massage oil
- quilt and pillow
- himalayan salt lamps
- mumu pajama dress/shirt (exactly as beautiful as you think)
- birth ball
- nipple shield
- nipple cream
- pump set
Yet to pack but are going in the bag:
- laptop and charger (playlists and hypnobirth tracks)
- phone and charger
- ID/health card
- toiletries (lip balm, deodorant, lotion, soap, face wash, tooth brush/paste)
Baby 2's Bag (haven't finished, as I need to find a few more boxes of newborn items):
- a few soft onesies
- a few muslin blankets and thicker ones
- (carseat and head support in car)
If you have any recommendations, let me know! I'm sure I am missing something. At least we live 3 minutes from the hospital if we forget anything.
So far I have made and froze Butternut Lentil Soup, Turkey Chili, Chicken Soup, Crock Pot Burrito Bowl and a few different Energy Ballz. Looking forward to getting a mini-deep freeze to make even more meals to be set for when we bring our baby home! The energy balls are going to be key for those late night feedings - anything you can eat quickly with one hand is huge. I remember how hard it was to stay fed and hydrated in those first couple weeks of 8 hours a day feedings - but it's so important. Doing the prep I can now! I was so lucky to be showered in food and help and gifts in Calgary last year, so I know how much work I need to do beforehand to make it easier in the beginning in Fernie this time. (Click photo for recipe)
Ending in gratitude:
- Birds chirping! They are singing, and signifying a lighter change. Spring is coming (yes there is snow everywhere, but it's going down!). I remember going into the hospital last year feeling like it was winter, and after we had P, there were buds on trees, sun in the sky and Spring has arrived. Love that feeling
- Penelope is pretty much over her cold. There were a couple hard days last week, so to be back to her sunny self is always the best. She laughs easily and often, eats like an adult woman, and interacts well with others. It's all good! Grateful for her health.
- Making it past 34 weeks! It feels like a big milestone to Mark and I.
I think this is what most people feel like at 37 weeks...
- Having time to write this and reflect. Feels good.
Thanks for reading!
Sending love from the mountains!